August 24, 2022

Dispelling 5 myths that surround grief

Dispelling 5 myths that surround grief

When we lose a loved one, it is normal to feel overwhelmed by grief. This intense emotion can be challenging to navigate and often leads us to believe things that aren't necessarily true. Sometimes we lock ourselves away emotionally, thinking it will make the pain disappear. But avoiding grief only makes it worse in the long run. Understanding the facts about grief is essential so that you can allow yourself to grieve healthily. So whether it's a question over which modern cremation urns are suitable and respectful to your loved ones or how much talking about those that have gone is acceptable, let's explore together and find out a little more about grief and how to manage it positively.

Myth 1 - People grieve in orderly stages

If only this were true, grief would be much easier. We've all heard about the Kubler-Ross model, that we deal with grief in a series of steps; denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. However, this model was not ever about people dealing with the loss of a loved one, it was the result of a study about patients who were terminally ill. The reality is that everyone grieves differently, and it's okay to feel however you feel - you aren't grieving incorrectly.

Myth 2 - Grief has an end date

There is not a magical day that our grief will be over. Years, and even decades later, thoughts and memories of loved ones can still pop up and bring on a wave of sadness. However, as time goes on, grief typically becomes less all-encompassing and more manageable. Simply put, we learn to live with it better.

Myth 3 - Grieving is a one-way process

People often suggest that grieving is a process of 'getting over' losing a loved one. This implies that grief is something negative that we should try to move on from as quickly as possible. But grief is a two-way process - it's not just about dealing with our emotions but also about connecting with the spirit and memory of our loved ones. You can do this in many ways, such as visiting their grave, looking through old photo albums, or talking about them with other people who knew them.

Myth 4 - Keeping reminders of the deceased makes grief worse

People attempt to navigate grief in many different ways, and for some people, this includes keeping reminders of their loved ones, such as photos or their remains in a cremation urn. Modern urns for ashes can be discrete and subtle, adding to the decor of your home. And why not - the people we loved had different personalities, and if we choose to keep their remains as a reminder, the way we home the ashes can represent the way they mattered to us. For this reason, our Planturns are designed to be a focal point, where you can come and nurture a small plant while being present with your departed loved one. Whichever type of cremation urns best suit your loved one, they become a central point for as long as you possess them. Many people talk to the urn, and, as with all aspects of grief, that's okay.

Myth 5 - No one wants to hear about your grief

It would be unfair to assume that everyone in your life wants to listen to your grief, not least because your closest friends and family are likely to know the departed and need to navigate their grieving. Because of this, finding a willing ear to express yourself can seem hard. But there will always be friends, family, support groups, or even licensed professionals who will be happy to sit and listen to you and discuss your feelings and thoughts. You don't have to deal with grief alone.